I’ll Take Impeachment for 200, Alex

As the country remains mesmerized, or not, with the impeachment hearings in the House Intelligence Committee focussing on whether President Trump committed “high crimes and misdemeanors” during his now infamous phone call with Ukrainian President Zelensky, it won’t be long before the whole thing becomes a permanent part of pop culture, as most everything eventually does in our media-saturated universe.

To get ahead of the game, here are my suggestions for the answers and questions to an upcoming category of “Trump Impeachment” on our most popular TV game show, Jeopardy. Let’s see how much you have been paying attention and whether you can be the next “Jeopardy James” by testing your knowledge of the ins and outs of the hearings so far.

Answer: Jim Jordan

Question: Who is the vociferous defender of the President whose primary qualification is his previous record of ignoring wrongdoing while he was an assistant coach at Ohio State by claiming he was not aware of sexual abuse of members of the wrestling team by the team doctor?

Answer: Ukrainian Corruption

Question: What is the Bidens?

Answer: Quid pro quo

Question: What the President did not demand when he insisted that President Zelensky investigate a political opponent before he released Congressionally-approved aid that was needed to continue to resist Putin’s Russian takeover of his country?

Answer: Gordon Sondland

Question: Who is the hotelier who bought an ambassadorship and has brought the name John Dean back to relevance?

Answer: Rudy Giuliani

Question: Who is the former New York City mayor turned presidential “lawyer” who replaced Michael Cohen as Trump’s Fixer and fills the cable talk shows with non sequiturs?

Answer: Mike Pence

Question: What is the bobblehead that continuously nods its head up and down when in the President”s presence?

Answer: The Three Amigos

Question: Who were the trio that acted as Trump’s lackeys in trying to coerce Zelensky to announce an investigation of the Bidens, and who were previously known as “Moe,” “Larry,” and “Curly?”

Answer: Crimea

Question: What is the Ukrainian region that was invaded by Russia in 2014 and the future site of a Trump resort and golf course?

Answer: Mick Mulvaney

Question: Who is the acting Chief of Staff who declared on tape that of course there was a quid pro quo and that we should all “get over it,” but denied he ever said it and claimed “that’s what people said I said?”

Answer: Devin Nunes

Question: Who is the space alien who took over the body of a Republican Congressman?

There you have it. You may be bored with the proceedings or think they are a waste of time as either a biased political exercise or a futile effort preceding an inevitable Senate acquittal. But before we begin our celebration of Thanksgiving, a tradition that began as the last time we put partisan rancor aside in this country, it is critical that we all pay attention. It’s only the future of our democracy at stake.