Les Bleus Go Blah
There is no secret that Americans like excess. Lots of food, big cars and houses, and, most of all, more money. And that is true of their interest in sports as well. NFL games feature dozens of points, NBA teams typically score more than a hundred and there is nothing like a 10–9 baseball game. So it is no surprise that we have never really warmed to the world’s favorite game, soccer, where many matches end at 1–1 or, even worse, 0–0. An American witnessing such a match would go home and say “nothing happened.” Except every four years when the U.S. Women’s National Team more often than not captures their version of the World Cup. In the last go round, the USWNT pummeled poor Thailand 15–0 in the preliminary round. How much more American can you get?
Yet, for the rest of the world, especially the Europeans, soccer has replaced war as their favorite pastime. France vs. Germany, England vs. Germany, France vs. England. Who doesn’t love the only slightly less violent recreation of the German Blitzkrieg, the Hundred Years War or the Napoleonic Wars? But history’s giants are sometimes irritated by the little countries; the remains of Yugoslavia seem to comprise half the teams, and the “neutrals,” Sweden and Switzerland, neither of which have fought a war in hundreds of years, frequently come along to spoil the party. And where the hell is North Macedonia?
More often than not, the big boys reign supreme, with France the current World Champion. Germany and Italy have won their share, and recently Spain has captured the biggest trophies. Despite their triumphs over Germany in two world wars, poor old England won their sole major championship in the 1966 World Cup and recall as if it were yesterday their previous biggest vic, when Henry V whipped the French at Agincourt. In 1415.
Well, in case you don’t know, all this is a lead in to the current European Soccer Championship currently taking place in a number of major cities of the continent. The Euro is second only to the World Cup in soccer importance, also held every four years in the two years between the global event, but maybe more entertaining because of the historical significance of the various rivalries. Many accuse the Europeans of always looking backward, and this year’s Euro is no exception. Delayed last year by the pandemic, UEFA, the sport’s European soccer governing body, decided to stick with the name Euro 2020 either to avoid printing new t-shirts or to reflect the snail-like pace of getting its population vaccinated.
Whether or not you appreciate the low-scoring nature of soccer, what is fascinating is that it is a sport where a “minnow” can frustrate a far superior team with its defensive tactics and every so often pull off a monumental upset, none bigger than a group of college kids from St. Louis leading the U.S. to a 1–0 victory over mighty England in the 1950 World Cup. Or, at the same tournament, Uruguay’s 2–1 win over Brazil in the final, a result so unexpected that more than a few of the 200,000 spectators leaped to their deaths from the top of Rio’s Estadio Maracana in despair.
Well, today was another one of those days. All powerful France, a team that raised the World Cup in 2018 in Moscow and is so talented it has superstars sitting on the bench, fell to tiny Switzerland after 120 minutes and a penalty shootout in Bucharest. The match was sealed when Kylian Mbappe, the most expensive player in the world, had his penalty try saved by Yann Sommer, the unheralded Swiss goalkeeper.
The Swiss had taken an early 1–0 lead before halftime, and was about to go up 2–0 when they were awarded a penalty midway through the second half. But French keeper Hugo Lloris came up big, the French offense came alive and in a span of two minutes, it was 2–1 France. When enigmatic Manchester United star Paul Pogba scored an incredible third goal, it looked all but over. But the Swiss didn’t fold and scored twice, including in the 90th minute to even the score at three. Les Bleus had some dangerous chances during the two overtime periods, but it was not to be. Sommer is destined to be the biggest Swiss hero since William Tell.
But, after all, it was only a soccer game, or was it? The country of France is teetering on the edge of political turmoil, suffering a surfeit of Islamic terrorist attacks while trying to maintain its secular religion, laicite, under which being French matters above all else. Perhaps the biggest loser was Emmanuel Macron, the embattled president who is trying to out-right the right in his quest for reelection next year. After all, who knows better than the French how to place the blame at the top? Just ask Marie Antoinette.
